Stranger than “Bird Box,” and more overrated, too

Photo by Chris Graythen/Getty Images

Bet yinz wish my original season forecast for the Steelers was right.

Remember? 10-6, AFC North champs, Divisional Round loss to whoever.

So as I type this, Erin is watching Bird Box, the vastly overrated and predictable Sandra Bullock film that Netflix is making a billion or so dollars off of. It occurs to me that the only thing stranger to me than the first 20 minutes of this movie is the Steelers’ season.

Or maybe it isn’t.

Maybe Bird Box explains it all.

Think about it – that faraway look in Coach Mike’s face after, let’s see, every play. The inexplicable urge to railroad the season with poor decisions – in and out of games – from how Tomlin clearly misread his team’s ability to handle themselves in the wake of the Le’Veon Bell drama to that amazing fake punt call in New Orleans (the ostensible end of the Steelers’ playoff hopes) – Tomlin’s coaching deserves an F-minus. He was bad all year.

If you need proof that Bird Box was incredibly predictable, ask my fake daughter what I texted her about the end of the movie at the 27-minute mark.

If you want proof that the Steelers’ season was incredibly predictable, see my column from 28 November. Told ya so.

So, in light of my Nostradamusesque clairvoyance, I will tell you all this: the Steelers should, but won’t, fire Mike Tomlin.

Sorry to the Tomlin apologists, but Coach T just won’t get it done. What is “it?” A Super Bowl appearance. Tomlin will not ever get the Steelers to the Super Bowl. He’s just not good enough. For goodness’ sake, Tomlin had Ben in his prime, Bell, AB, and a line that included Pouncey and DeCastro, all in their primes, and he could not get them to the Super Bowl. Ain’t happenin’ – no how, no way.

Move on, Steelers – move on. Or, keep Tomlin out of whatever ridiculous sense of stubborn loyalty you all must have to ignore the truth about his coaching, and keep spinning your wheels in the mud while better coached teams find their way to the Super Bowl.

Other MoioMusings:

  • Yes, Tomlin is my main culprit, but I am not so naive to understand that the players play the game. I am not excusing the players’ roles in the horrible losses at Denver, at Oakland and the second-half meltdown against San Diego/Los Angeles, or the tie in Cleveland, so this offseason should be a pivotal time for Kevin Colbert to prove that he can do something to fix a mediocre defense that celebrates an ordinary player like Joe Haden as some kind of good defensive back, or continues to run Bud DuPree on the field week after week to do absolutely nothing. Let’s not forget Vince Williams as the centerpiece of the softest middle in football.
  • Pens baby! Here is why the Pens are rolling (James and G agree, so I know this is exactly why): 1. Kris LeTang is all the way back from whatever had him in his season-long malaise last year. He is playing at an elite level and it has had a ripple effect on the others on the blue line. 2. Goaltending. Murray has, for now, returned to form and Casey DeSmith has been excellent. 3. They have stopped allowing so many premium scoring chances when they have the lead in games. All teams allow shots – and the Pens allow many – but they have been better at pushing shooters to the perimeter and clearing rebounds. That’s it. No magic. The Pens can score, so playing well enough in their own end to hold teams down is essential.
  • I am proud that I did not compromise my Pittsburgh integrity today. I did NOT root for the Browns. Never would. I did, however, root for the Ravens to lose 🙂

 

Happy New Year to you all – may 2019 be prosperous in every way that matters, and in Pittsburgh sports, too.

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